Fukuoka, November

Yokozuna Asashoryu promised to continue annoying the crap out of Japanese fans of Sumo by winning at this month's Kyushu Basho. The sole Grand Champion is gunning to win all tourneys this year to become the only Yokozuna in history to achieve that feat along with seven consectutive Emperor's cups. Mongolian Asashoryu has already bothered fans of Japan's traditional national sport by acting like a stuck-up prick in the ring, by ignoring the rules of conduct for a Yokozuna, and especially by toppling the other wrestlers as if they were dominoes.

The obvious superiority of the foreign champion has led to criticisms of the training and will of the Japanese Rikishi to win. However, rather than take the chance to support young up-coming wrestlers in order to foster a home-grown champion of the future, fans are staying away in droves. "I used to watch Sumo religiously," comments long time fan Hironobu Takamatsu, "but now that Japanese aren't winning it's completely boring. When a Japanese yokozuna gets on top I'll go back. In the meantime I couldn't give a shit about the sport."

RST's own Sumo correspondent, Hinomaru Ojisan, has suggested that a remedy to the situation would be simply to ban foreigners from Sumo altogether, or at least slap a few penalties on them, like a broken leg or two. Unfortunately for Japanese fans, the traditional "foreigners are bigger" excuse doesn't work here because Asashoryu is a little bastard in Sumo terms. Adding insult to injury is the fact that the yokzuna's only potential rival is Bulgarian Kotooshu, giving even die hard fans another reason to turn off. Whatever happens in Fukuoka, you can bet no one will be watching.

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